Adaptation is key for survival - an IWSG post

Welcome to the second edition of IWSG for 2015. Yes, it's here already, and the scary thought is I'll be introducing you to December's edition before you know it.

But enough of wishing the time away, instead I'd like to give you a quick introduction to me. I was out of the bloggy loop for the end of 2014 and I missed the memo that asked us to say a few words about ourselves in the New Year IWSG post. So, I'm doing it now instead, better late than never, eh?

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My intro ...

I live in England in rural Norfolk, and my regular day job is working for a world-class scientific research facility in Norwich, concentrating mainly on DNA sequencing.

I'm currently on maternity leave, having had my second daughter in June last year, to go with my six year old daughter. Two children is definitely enough, after all you only have two hands, right? 

Writing is a hobby for me at the moment, but I'm doing more all the time and eventually I'd like to earn enough to give up the day job. I don't need to earn millions (although it'd be nice), just enough for what I need.

So, that's me! It's been fun getting to know you all too, and long may it continue.

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So, recently I've been insecure about missing task deadlines. It used to happen a lot, with the result that I felt like a failure, and the effect is cumulative.

I start off with great intentions (don't we all?), marking out in my diary everything I need to get done and when I'm going to do it. I always plan in advance, with plenty of time to draft and edit before submission dates approach. A detailed diary plan is all very well, of course, until something unexpected happens ...

I'm slowly learning to be prepared for flexibility when it comes to these things. If something happens to delay a task, then I need to just reassess and re-jig the plans a little.

I realise this is a straightforward and simple solution, but it just hasn't occurred to me before for some reason. I know it's good to try and get things planned out in advance, and then if I do look like missing the deadline I can just adjust to fit it in elsewhere.

Just like any other creature on this planet has to adapt to its new environment, as a writer I need to learn to adapt my tasks to fit in around every day life. At the moment, this feels like my new environment.

I think some of it, though, also has to do with my (supposed) OCD. I just don't feel comfortable crossing things off without doing them, it just doesn't seem natural. But I need to stop worrying about this sort of ridiculous thing. After all, my diary isn't necessarily messy, it's just a reflection of a working writers tool, right? RIGHT?

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For more information on the amazing entity that is the Insecure Writers Support Group, click on the link and head over. Here you will find the list of who's participating and it's well worth a browse to see what everyone's insecurities are. Trust me, you're not alone, there are plenty of us on the same wavelength.

 Happy IWSG Day!

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Caught by the blogging blues - An IWSG post

 
Hello to all! I hope the first day of this new month finds you all well.

I've not been doing too badly of late, but I'm floundering a little when it comes to the bloggy world. I seem to have lost the drive and enthusiasm right now, and I'm not entirely sure how to get it back.

Friday will be the third anniversary of this here blog of mine, and I was determined not to let it just fly by like last year. But here I am again, not really venturing out into the world and the date is upon me once again. Where does all the time go?

I've grown rather despondent, and not just in regards to my blog, but lots of other life stuff too.

I've tried not to mention too much about it, but when I had my baby daughter at the beginning of June my life was turned up on its end, and in more ways than usual with a new baby. 
She was born with a serious defect that could have claimed her life at the time, had it not been for a wonderful consultant at our hospital who saved her for us.

She is thriving now and, despite continued hospital visits and one more scheduled operation, she is in no danger. However, the whole experience has left me feeling very strange. 
At times of crisis, your body just takes over and you get through it because that's what you need to do, but now the dust has settled, all the emotions are creeping up on me. I feel very spaced out a lot of the time if I'm honest. I've felt like this isn't really my life at all, and I'm just going through the motions of what needs to be done every day.

I feel so flat all of the time, writing and blogging are the last things on my mind, and I'm teetering on the edge of giving up on it. It's things like this hop that have kept me hanging on by my fingertips, but I'm struggling to get back into the same groove that I've been in before.

Self-doubt and low self-esteem are the dominant forces at work in my mind right now, and some words of advice and encouragement would be hugely welcome. Tell me I'm not the only one who's been caught in this pit of seeming despair ...

Love and hugs xxx 

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For more information on the amazing entity that is the Insecure Writers Support Group, click on the link and head over. Here you will find everyone else participating and it's well worth a browse to see what everyone's insecurities are. Trust me, you're not alone, there are plenty of us on the same wavelength.

 Happy IWSG Day!

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Is it ever enough? - an IWSG post

 

Is it really that time again? IWSG time? The last month has just whizzed by and I feel like I haven't achieved anything.

In actual fact though, when I think about it properly I've managed to get more done than the previous couple of months. I never seem to be satisfied with my progress though, however much time I manage to spend on something.

I've read two books in the last month, having not picked up a single one for weeks beforehand. I've got myself back into blogging and managed a couple of flash fiction stories for the Writers Wednesday blog hop (which is on later today by the way! ;-) ).

And still I feel like I should, or could, be doing more. Like every other writer out there, I have family commitments that keep me busy, and finding time for reading and writing is definitely a challenge. But lately it's been getting easier to find time to fit these things in, and I'm enjoying it again. 

I just need to adjust my mindset to feel pleased with what I have managed to do, rather than fretting about what I haven't managed to do. I'll get there I'm sure, after all it's all about baby steps.

How about you? Are you ever satisfied with what you've managed to get done? Is this just part of being a writer, always feeling like you should be giving that little bit more?

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For more information on the amazing entity that is the Insecure Writers Support Group, click on the link and head over. Here you will find everyone else participating and it's well worth a browse to see what everyone's insecurities are. Trust me, you're not alone, there are plenty of us on the same wavelength.

 Happy IWSG Day!

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A motivational message - an IWSG post

Just a quick one from me for this months IWSG, a motivational message that I've been in desperate need of myself.

I'm sure many of you will appreciate the sentiment:

writerswrite1.wordpress.com

This can sometimes be the hardest thing to do, but we all need to make that effort to get our stories started. 


For more information on the amazing entity that is the Insecure Writers Support Group, click on the link and head over. Here you will find everyone else participating and it's well worth a browse to see what's everyone's insecurities are. Trust me, you're not alone, there are plenty of us on the same wavelength.

 Happy IWSG Day!

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Setting myself free - an IWSG post

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  This post is part of the Insecure Writers Support Group (IWSG), a great place to share troubles and triumphs with fellow writers. To find more blogs on this hop, and to sign up yourself head over to Alex J Cavanaugh's blog to find out more. He's definitely one worth following.


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Although I like to be as organised as I can, setting deadlines, writing lists, keeping track of my progress, etc. I actually find for my writing this kind of behaviour is counter-productive. 
With a full time job, a four year old, OU study and a house and husband to keep I need to be fairly organised to keep on top of everything, and in this context having lists all over the place works well.

But not so for writing. I've tried so many times to come up with a structured and methodical way of going about writing for competitions, or starting on something longer, getting ready for NaNoWriMo so many times but eventually failing. This year I tried doing the Don't Break the Chain Challenge and the Writers Book of Days, and if I look closely at the statistics for both then I'm failing miserably at those too.

I'm feeling down because I'm not achieving these goals and I'm doing it to myself. I'm beginning to realise that writing should be the one area of my life where I can feel completely free to be and do what I want to, but instead I'm trying too much to control it like everything else going on in my life.

Last week I decided to abandon these challenges, even logging my word count for each day, and my mind felt a lot freer and my writing flowed more easily. I've been so busy scheduling and keeping track of my writing stuff I'd lost sight of the actual writing and why I wanted to do it in the first place.

So, this is my new strategy (for now), to let go of all this administrative stuff and just get on with the writing. I'm still learning the skill and finding my voice as a writer. Once I'm comfortable with my style and my stories then I can go to the next level of submitting and setting deadlines.

There's a long journey ahead of me and I'm going to enjoy the early stages of finding myself. When I let myself go it's much more fun anyway!

What stage are you at on your journey? Are you organised or do you just wing it?


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Support is Priceless - an IWSG post

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  This post is part of the Insecure Writers Support Group (IWSG), a great place to share troubles and triumphs with fellow writers. To find more blogs on this hop, and to sign up yourself head over to Alex J Cavanaugh's blog to find out more. He's definitely one worth following.


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 About two weeks ago I published a post about the struggles I'd been having keeping up with everything that's going on in my life.
I have study going on, this blog and some writing stuff that I'm trying to make more time for, and they are all things that are important to me. In some way or other they each give me some purpose, providing the escapism I need to help me relax and be myself.

As you well know, there is still the everyday world to contend with. I also have a full time job, as I know many others do, a family and home life all to be juggled too. It's tiring work keeping all those balls in the air, but if you can manage it then it's all worthwhile. After all, if you haven't got to put even a little bit of effort in then it's probably not worth doing in the first place.

I had some encouraging and helpful comments in response to this post, and I want to take this opportunity to say a huge thank you to those that took the time to help me through. I read each comment a few times, taking on board the advice offered and you have definitely helped me to see through the quagmire and find the light on the other side.

I'm continuing with my studies, after all it's only for another four months and then it's finished. There is an exam at the end but that's a whole different bag of worries. I'm over half way through it now so I'm battling on to get to the end. I just have to keep an eye on my workload and not get myself into a massive frenzy.
I get three months off and then the next part of the course starts in October. This will be a creative writing module, which means I will be able to combine my writing with studying. I won't have to feel guilty about doing one over the other.

The point of this post is to highlight just how valuable it is to have the support of others that have either been through or are currently in the same situation as you. That's why I love this monthly blog hop, it's a chance to help out others where I can, and to share some of my own woes or successes with others.

It can be a lonely place, distance learning and writing by yourself, but even if you can't get to a writers group or tutorial, there is a whole world of like-minded (and possibly crazy, or is that just me?) people to help you through the bad times, and celebrate the good times.


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Who's keeping score? - An IWSG post

It's that time again folks, so who's ready for the next meeting of the Insecure Writer's Support Group?

For those of you unfamiliar with IWSG, it's a great way for writers to get any writing worries off their chest and realise they aren't the only ones with these woes. Whether you want to offer words of encouragement or just use it to vent some frustrations, it's great for meeting new people and discovering new blogs. Once again, huge thanks go to Alex J Cavanaugh. To check out more contributions to IWSG or to join yourself just click here and all will become clear.

 

  

A couple of weeks ago I decided that I was going to try and post something every day on my blog. I've done alright with it, posting most days, but I have missed one or two.

Yesterday I didn't post anything, I'd had quite a tough day at work and I just needed a rest once I got home. My brain was too full to concentrate on anything properly.

I started off feeling guilty about this, I hadn't lived up to my own statement of posting every day. But then I stopped and thought about it, and actually I think I said I would try and post something every day. I've posted most days so a miss or two isn't that bad, surely.

I also felt bad that I was letting you guys down, my lovely followers. Here I was, saying that I was going to do something and I wasn't quite delivering. But it's absurd to think that each one of you is keeping a daily count of when I make my posts. At least, I hope it is anyway :-) It's not like anyone is keeping a score, and I'm sure I won't have to have a signed letter justifying my absence.

The truth is, I'm keeping up when I can and recently I've been able to make the time to do it. We all deserve a little rest from things now and again, and the key is to make sure I go back to it eventually. The only person keeping track is myself, and if I'm happy with how the blog's going then I've no real reason to complain.

How many of you are your own worst enemy with this sort of thing?

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